Karaoke Party
by SophiaCrutchfeild
Summary: What happens when the mediator characters hit the mike? Paul Slater- Jesse's girl. Jesse de Silva- Oh, Susannah. Kelly Prescot- Material Girl. Post song ideas in the comments!
1. Jesse's Girl

**Author's Note- I have been planning this story for a little while now. It's mostly just for fun, and not serious AT ALL. So if you like deep, meaningful stuff, look at Total Reverse of the Heart. Not exactly meaningful, but way more serious than this!**

**-Sophia**

"This will be fun, Jesse," Susannah coaxed. "Its just karaoke."

"I don't know if this is such a good idea," Jesse replied. They were going to a party that some friend of Jake's was throwing, and everyone in Carmel between the ages of fourteen and twenty just _had_ to attend.

"Don't worry so much," Susannah chastised. "I mean you don't even have to sing if you don't want to."

Jesse groaned and muttered a few curses in Spanish before entering… only to see Paul Slater on stage, about to perform.

"Okay, this is a throwback, I guess, but it certainly represents my situation," he was saying. As the music started playing, Jesse tensed up, recognizing the song.

"Oh no," muttered Susannah. "I thought we were pat this!"

Paul- "Jesse's a friend, yeah he's been a good friend of mine."

"That's not even true," Jesse said.

Paul- "But lately something's changed and it's not hard to define, Jesse's got himself a girl and I want to make her mine."

"Forget it!" Susannah called. Paul just winked and continued singing while people began to look curiously at Jesse and Susannah.

Paul- "And she's watching him with those eyes and she's loving him with that body I just know it! And he's holding her in his arms late, late at night!"

Now people were openly staring at Susannah and Jesse's very red faces. "Okay, first, not true, second, not your business," Susannah said, glaring.

Paul- "You know I wish that I had Jesse's girl, I wish that I had Jesse's girl, why can't I find a woman like that!"

Kelly Prescot shot Susannah a death glare.

Paul- "I play along with the charade, there doesn't seem to be a reason to change."

"Can we go now?" Jesse whispers. "Much more of this and I might do something regrettable."

"No we can_ not_ leave, we can't let him win," Susannah whispers back.

Paul- "You know I feel so dirty when they start talking cute, I want to tell her that I love her but the point is probably moot. Because she's watching him with those eyes, and she's loving him with that body I just know it!"

"You're so wrong, I have _not_ been 'loving' anyone with this body!" Susannah growls.

Paul- "And he's holding her in his arms late, late at night, you know I wish that I had Jesse's girl, I wish that I had Jesse's girl, why can't I find a woman like that?"

"I see why you want to leave, but I think it's almost over," Susannah tells Jesse. "And you have my permission to beat him up later." Jesse nods.

Paul- "And I'm looking in that mirror all the time, wondering what she don't see in me, I've been funny, I've bee cool with the lines, Isn't that the way love's supposed to be?"

"I can't believe he's doing this in front of everyone," Susannah mutters.

"I can't believe you thought he wouldn't," Jesse replies.

Paul- "You know I wish that I had Jesse's girl, I wish that I had Jesse's girl, why can't I find a woman like Jesse's girl? I wish that I had Jesse's girl, why can't I find a woman like that?"

As the song ends, Paul makes his way over to Susannah and Jesse. "Like my performance?"


	2. Oh, Susannah

**Author's Note- I'm having a lot of fun with this one. I hope you are too! I'm trying to find songs to fit all the characters, but I'm going to need a hand. Please comment your ideas! Thank you very much.**

Jesse took the stage next.

"This one is for _my girlfriend,_ Susannah Simon." Jesse smiled at Susannah and shot another quick glare at Paul. "Although I still don't see the point of this or why she is making me do this." The Audience laughed.

"Why _are _you making him do this?" Cee Cee asks Susannah, curiously.

"Because it will be fun," Susannah giggled.

Jesse- (Pained) "Oh, I come from Alabama with a banjo on my knee, I'm going to Louisiana for my true love to see."

"You're right," Cee Cee grins. "This is fun."

Jesse- "Oh Susannah, don't you cry for me, because I come from Alabama with a banjo on my knee."

Jesse smiles at Susannah, who winks.

Jesse- "It rained so hard the day I left, the weather was so dry, the sun so hot I froze to death, Susannah don't you cry."

Adam wanders over to Susannah and Cee Cee. "Is there any reason why Jesse is trying to convince Suze not to cry with old folk songs?"

"I don't think so," Cee Cee replies cheerfully.

Jesse- "Oh Susannah, don't you cry for me, because I come from Alabama with a banjo on my knee."

"You're next," Cee Cee tells Adam.

"Oh no," Adam groans.

Jesse- "I had a dream the other night when everything was still, I thought I saw Susannah coming down the hill. Oh Susannah, don't you cry for me, because I come from Alabama with a banjo on my knee."

Jesse glances at Suze, and their eyes meet.

Jesse- "A buckwheat cake was in her mouth, a tear was in her eye, I said 'I come from Dixie Land, Susannah, don't you cry. Oh, Susannah, don't you cry for me, because I come from Alabama with a banjo on my knee."

"He must _really_ love you," Cee Cee contemplated.

But Susannah was already onstage, kissing Jesse like her life depended on it.

"You're very lucky that I love you," Jesse muttered amidst all the applause.


	3. Material Girl

**Author's Note- Hey, remember me? Sorry it took so long to get back to this. Without further ado…**

Kelly Prescot hit the stage next.

Kelly- "Some boys kiss me, some boys hug me, I think they're okay!"

"She isn't serious," Susannah laughed.

Kelly- "If they don't give me proper credit, I just walk away! They can beg and they can plead but they can't see the light!"

"That's right, that's right!" Debbie chimed in.

Kelly- "Cause the boy with the cold hard cash is always Mr. Right."

Paul raised an eyebrow, and decided that Kelly was probably never going to break up with him.

Kelly- "Cause we are living in a material world, and I am a material girl, you know that we are living in a material world, and I am a material girl! Some boys romance, some boys slow dance, that's alright with me!"

Cee Cee looked at Susannah, "This song is weirdly perfect for her."

Kelly- "If they can't raise my interest then I have to let them be! Some boys lie and some boys try but I don't let them play!"

"No way, no way!" sang Debbie. Brad looked annoyed.

Kelly- "Only boys that save their pennies make my rainy day, Cause we are living in a material world and I am a material girl, you know that we are living in a material world, and I am a material girl!"

Adam shook his head. "Why do people like that girl?"

Kelly- "Material, material, boys may come and boys may go, and that's alright you see, experience has made me rich and now they're after me! Living in a material world and I am a material girl, you know that we are living in a material world and I am a material girl!"

"Well, she's rich, skinny, and blond," Susannah said.

"She's shallow and-" Jesse said something rude in Spanish.

Kelly- "Living in a material world, and I am a material girl, you know that we are living in a material world and I am a material girl!"

"Agreed. I don't even know what you said, but I agree with you," Susannah said.

Kelly-"A material, material, a material, material, a material, material, a material world! Material, material!"

As the song finished, the audience erupted into applause. And laughter. Kelly smiled as all the boys in school threw cash at her.


	4. Destroyer

Author's Note- I know Red Beaumont is a little old for karaoke, but trust me on this one. Also, thank you to a good friend of mine for recommending the song "Destroyer" by The Kinks!

-Sophia

As Kelly walked off stage, a limo pulled up to the party.

"Who could that be?" Susannah wondered.

Tad Beaumont stepped out, grinning. He walked over to Susannah and Jesse. "Hi Sue, long time no see."

"Hi Tad," Susannah said. Jesse looked at Tad with annoyance. Tad looked at Jesse with confusion. Then, on a whim, Red Beaumont stepped out of the limo and got up on stage.

"Oh no," Tad groaned.

Red- "Met a girl called Lola and I took her back to my place, feeling guilty feeling scared, hidden cameras everywhere!"

"He's still…?" Susannah looked at Tad.

"Yep," Tad looked embarrassed.

Red- "Stop! Hold on, stay in control. Girl, I want you here with me, but I'm really not as cool as I'd like to be."

"Is your father still a vampire?" Jesse asked. "Because I don't want him near Susannah, if he is."

"No, thank god, but he's still…"

Red- "Because there's a red under my bed, and there's a little yellow man in my head, and there's a true blue inside of me!"

"Crazy," Tad finished.

"I see," Susannah said. "L.A. didn't cure him yet?"

Red-"That keeps stopping me touching you, wanting you, loving you!"

"He doesn't think he's a vampire," Tad offered. "Most of the time, anyway."

Red- "Paranoia, thee destroyer! Paranoia thee destroyer! Well, I fell asleep, then I woke, feeling kind of queer, Lola looked at me and said 'You look so weird.' And she said 'Man, there's really something wrong with you. One day you're going to self-destruct.'"

"Who is Lola, anyway?" Susannah asked.

"I do not know," Tad said with faux-cheerfulness.

Red- "'You're up, you're down, I can't work you out! You get a good thing going, then you blow yourself out! Silly boy, you self-destroyer!' Silly boy, you self-destroyer!"

"Susannah, do not talk to that man," Jesse muttered.

Red- "Silly boy, you got so much to live for, so much to aim for, so much to try for! You blow it all with your paranoia!"

"Alright," Susannah agreed.

Red-"You're so insecure, you self-destroyer! And it goes like this, here it goes: Paranoia, thee destroyer! Here it goes again! Paranoia, thee destroyer!"

The crowd began cheering. "You know, he's actually pretty good," Cee Cee said as she walked over to Susannah.

Red- "Doctor, doctor, help me please, I know you'll understand, there's a time device inside of me, I'm a self-destructing man! There's a red under my bed, and there's a little green man in my head! He said 'You're not going crazy, you're just a bit sad, 'cause there's a man in you, knowing you, tearing you into two!'"

"Is that really what the doctor said?" Susannah asked.

"No, he said, 'You have been given hallucinogens, take these pills to help get them out of your system," Tad clarified.

Red- "Silly boy, you self-destroyer! Paranoia, thee destroyer! Self-destroyer, wreck your health, destroy your friends, destroy yourself! The time device of self-destruction!"

"No doctor would ever say that," Cee Cee told Susannah.

Red- "Light the fuse and start eruption! Yeah, and it goes like this, here it goes, paranoia, thee destroyer! Here's to paranoia! Paranoia, thee destroyer! Hey hey, here it goes! Paranoia, thee destroyer! And it goes like this!"

"Your father is a decent singer, for a madman," Jesse commented. "Although I still don't like you."

"I don't know why not," Tad said. "You've never met me before."

Red- "Paranoia, thee destroyer! And it goes like this!"

The song abruptly ended. Red bowed, and was escorted back into his limo by two security guards.

"I'll see you around," Tad said, and went off to talk to some other jocks.

"You know, you're kind of a hypocrite about why you don't like him," Susannah said. "You kiss me to say goodnight every single night."

"It's ok when I do it," Jesse told her. "I refuse to share you."

And as if to prove it, he did.


	5. Chapter 4

Author's Note- I know Red Beaumont is a little old for karaoke, but trust me on this one. Also, thank you to a good friend of mine for recommending the song "Destroyer" by The Kinks!

-Sophia

As Kelly walked off stage, a limo pulled up to the party.

"Who could that be?" Susannah wondered.

Tad Beaumont stepped out, grinning. He walked over to Susannah and Jesse. "Hi Sue, long time no see."

"Hi Tad," Susannah said. Jesse looked at Tad with annoyance. Tad looked at Jesse with confusion. Then, on a whim, Red Beaumont stepped out of the limo and got up on stage.

"Oh no," Tad groaned.

Red- "Met a girl called Lola and I took her back to my place, feeling guilty feeling scared, hidden cameras everywhere!"

"He's still…?" Susannah looked at Tad.

"Yep," Tad looked embarrassed.

Red- "Stop! Hold on, stay in control. Girl, I want you here with me, but I'm really not as cool as I'd like to be."

"Is your father still a vampire?" Jesse asked. "Because I don't want him near Susannah, if he is."

"No, thank god, but he's still…"

Red- "Because there's a red under my bed, and there's a little yellow man in my head, and there's a true blue inside of me!"

"Crazy," Tad finished.

"I see," Susannah said. "L.A. didn't cure him yet?"

Red-"That keeps stopping me touching you, wanting you, loving you!"

"He doesn't think he's a vampire," Tad offered. "Most of the time, anyway."

Red- "Paranoia, thee destroyer! Paranoia thee destroyer! Well, I fell asleep, then I woke, feeling kind of queer, Lola looked at me and said 'You look so weird.' And she said 'Man, there's really something wrong with you. One day you're going to self-destruct.'"

"Who is Lola, anyway?" Susannah asked.

"I do not know," Tad said with faux-cheerfulness.

Red- "'You're up, you're down, I can't work you out! You get a good thing going, then you blow yourself out! Silly boy, you self-destroyer!' Silly boy, you self-destroyer!"

"Susannah, do not talk to that man," Jesse muttered.

Red- "Silly boy, you got so much to live for, so much to aim for, so much to try for! You blow it all with your paranoia!"

"Alright," Susannah agreed.

Red-"You're so insecure, you self-destroyer! And it goes like this, here it goes: Paranoia, thee destroyer! Here it goes again! Paranoia, thee destroyer!"

The crowd began cheering. "You know, he's actually pretty good," Cee Cee said as she walked over to Susannah.

Red- "Doctor, doctor, help me please, I know you'll understand, there's a time device inside of me, I'm a self-destructing man! There's a red under my bed, and there's a little green man in my head! He said 'You're not going crazy, you're just a bit sad, 'cause there's a man in you, knowing you, tearing you into two!'"

"Is that really what the doctor said?" Susannah asked.

"No, he said, 'You have been given hallucinogens, take these pills to help get them out of your system," Tad clarified.

Red- "Silly boy, you self-destroyer! Paranoia, thee destroyer! Self-destroyer, wreck your health, destroy your friends, destroy yourself! The time device of self-destruction!"

"No doctor would ever say that," Cee Cee told Susannah.

Red- "Light the fuse and start eruption! Yeah, and it goes like this, here it goes, paranoia, thee destroyer! Here's to paranoia! Paranoia, thee destroyer! Hey hey, here it goes! Paranoia, thee destroyer! And it goes like this!"

"Your father is a decent singer, for a madman," Jesse commented. "Although I still don't like you."

"I don't know why not," Tad said. "You've never met me before."

Red- "Paranoia, thee destroyer! And it goes like this!"

The song abruptly ended. Red bowed, and was escorted back into his limo by two security guards.

"I'll see you around," Tad said, and went off to talk to some other jocks.

"You know, you're kind of a hypocrite about why you don't like him," Susannah said. "You kiss me to say goodnight every single night."

"It's ok when I do it," Jesse told her. "I refuse to share you."

And as if to prove it, he did.


End file.
